The story of uncle Lazy Larsen

This is a story that my parents and my grandparents told to me when I was growing up as a kid. It is a story that I have repeated to my own kids. Here is how it goes.

Have you heard of the story of old Lazy Larsen? Oh, you haven't? Well, let me tell you about him.

Once upon a time there was an uncle that was so lazy, the people called him Lazy Larsen. He was so lazy that he wouldn't do anything for himself. He would not work. He would not feed himself. He expected others to do his work for him. The people were so exasperated with him, because he wouldn't do anything, they decided to bury him alive. So they put old Lazy Larsen into a coffin and they were taking him down main street to the cemetary to bury him. A person was going through town and stopped the funeral procession.

"Who died?"

"Oh, no one died. Old Lazy Larsen refuses to do anything. He won't work to provide for himself. He won't do anything. So we're going to bury him alive in the cemetary."

"Oh no, don't do that. If he needs food, I have a whole field of corn that he can have and he can live on for free."

Lazy Larsen rises up out of the coffin and asks, "Is the corn shelled and schucked?"

The passer by says, "No, it isn't. But that can be done easily enough."

Lazy Larsen says, "Drive on driver, drive on."

Lazy Larsen was so lazy that he was even unwilling to accept free food that required just a little bit of work to prepare.